Pop-up ads??!!

I didn't realize I had pop-up ads on my blog!!! I hate them, and I apologize to everyone for them. I WILL revamp it and remove all those little ads I placed on it. I am truly distressed over this fact. I have been saying for some time that I needed and wanted to redo this thing, I just haven't taken the time.

If you haven't realized, I'm turning over a new leaf (or trying to). I have to quit putting things off so much. I have oh so many things I want to do and get done but I always seem to get turned away. NO MORE! I've made up my mind to set goals and keep them.

I guess all the audio books I've been listening to have had an impact. I've gotten into listening to them when I'm doing other things. I won't listen to a book I truly want to read, only those that I don't think I'll care too much about. I figure if I find I actually like it I'll read it. I love to read, but with everything I need to do, I don't seem to be able to proportion my time. Maybe that will be the next book I listen to?

Life seems to be hectic at the moment. Anxiety and turmoil reigns. It will be difficult to stop putting things off with everything I need to work on. It's just something I must do. Bite the bullet and bear down to work through the pain. There's something in every aspect of my life to work on.

There is good news. A friend of ours got back in touch with us yesterday. She seems to be doing incredible. She has signed a book deal for four (?) books. If not four then three, as I haven't talked to her to get it straight. I can't say enough good things about the family. Her and her husband are the most astounding people I have ever had the pleasure of knowing. I can say, with no reserve, that I have valued every conversation I've had with them. Each time I felt as though I took more from them than I gave. They are in that narrow margin of people I consider impressive.

It surprises me none that she has signed the book deal that she has. They both have an unimaginable mind, and their experiences are second only to a few. I haven't read a bit of the book, as is hasn't been released, and am chomping at the bit awaiting the possibilities. It seems to be a Young Readers book. From the slight description I've seen, I'm guessing it's the feminine version of the Harry Potter series (or in that genre somewhere). He's her website so you can check it out for yourself - http://www.melissa-marr.com. I'll try to let you know the release date when I learn. (Just reiterating that I have yet to say/here two words from them in years as my wife and son talked to her last night. Soon enough I guess.)

It was amazing to see how the entire family radiated with excitement and anticipation when our friend called. She called my parents first, early in the day when we were at work. My father told my wife about it, and when she checked our voice mail, she found a message from her. She called her back when we got home and got her voice mail. Then, everyone was all a twitter with expectations. My son never talks on the phone. He talked to her for over a half an hour! And it wasn't just, "Yes. No. Maybe. Sometimes." He tried to tell her everything that happened in just a few minutes. Afterwards, he was on cloud nine.

I kind of have mixed feelings about rejoining the friendship. I'm intoxicated over their success. But, it makes me question my own deeds. Have I moved forward in life? Have I done anything at all? What have I accomplished? Maybe I have feelings of inferiority. It makes you take a self inventory of your life. I think the biggest thing I have a problem with is our house. It's old and too small for us. It needs a lot of work done to it. I think I mentioned (spoken as "complained) it in a blog previously. The best thing that could be done to it is to take a match to it and put it out of it's misery.

Oh well. I'll be receiving two raises this month, I think. I was already given a step increase and I'm told I will be getting a grade increase. That will help things out. In due time we will be able to afford a bigger, better house. It's just frustrating trying to make due with the house we have when we need so much more from it. We do not have anyone in as we are embarrassed of it. I hope they don't want to come here for a visit. It's very ratty and just not big enough to entertain anyone in. And it's not even the fact that they would judge us badly for it. It's just a source of humiliation for us. It's really bad when our eldest wants to help get a new house. He was entered into a poetry contest by his teacher/school. Among all the student in several schools, his poem was one of a few chosen to be published in a book. They will be judged and the poet voted to have the best poem will receive three thousand dollars. a couple of days ago, he said he hoped he won. When asked what he would do with the money, he asked if he would be able to put it towards a down payment on a house with our money. What do you say to that?

I guess that everything that happened recently built up to self doubt. It's not a good feeling being unable to give your children what they need. And they truly need a bigger, better house. One of the things I have to work feverishly on. The one good thing about it is we have never bought a house before - first time buyers discounts. I'm sure to keep anyone interested in the progress, as when we do get a house, I won't be able to contain myself.

That's enough ranting, praising, kow-towing, B@*%$ing, and worshipping for now. More next time.

Best.